June Thoughts: Our World In Chaos

Dear friends,

We were already feeling the strain and fatigue of quarantine. Hearts and minds were heavy with adult fears and conjectures about what our near future held. Then, we bore horrified witness again to the brutal murders of our black brothers and sisters. Our hearts are broken, and despair feels constantly near.

It is an act of incredible courage to bring a child into the world. We do so with a hopeful trust that the world will be generous; that adults will be kind and humane to the person we created. That is not a hope that black mothers can hold on to. There is a worried vigilance that every black mom carries in her heart and mind: "will my child be next?" George Floyd, as he died on the street, invoked his mother to come to him.  The ache in the hearts of mothers everywhere is immeasurable.

We need a reckoning. We need justice. We need to help build a country where black families can rest easier, believing that their children will be safe. We need to do this work together. Here’s timely words from a mother, that was posted over the weekend:

“Want to know why Minneapolis (and now others) is burning? 

Mama. He called Mama.

At least that’s why I want to burn, why I feel like I could scream until flames rip out of my throat. He has called up great power. I want all of us to turn, all of us who have heard Mama in a store and thought it meant us. It’s time to turn. White mamas, mamas with privilege, you have been summoned. And any of us who have ever cried out Mama, we hear it too, down in our bones. It’s a cry that can’t go unanswered anymore. So Minneapolis burns. And we need to gut all the spaces in our lives where systemic racism has quarter.

I think of the other mamas who turned a tide: Emmett Till’s, for one. We speak out of the deep mystery from whence all life springs. My white people: Nurture antiracism in your life like you would a child in your arms, even if you’ve only just heard it named. Learn what it means and how to foster it. Care about it, give it space in your life. Come to understand it, even if it’s difficult and challenges everything.

Mama is coming. And the men who make order in the world should be very afraid.” (Mary Helen Kennerly)

 
Families of color, we are committed to being in this fight with you. We are continually working on our own personal and professional blind-spots, while seeking to be aware of how our hidden biases can impact the support we offer. We will stand for justice with you and make every effort in the continuing months and years to be a safe landing place for you and your families.

Additional reading on racism and the impact on families of color:

The Intergenerational Transmission of Discrimination: Children’s Experiences of Unfair Treatment and Their Mothers’ Health at Midlife

The Unbearable Grief of Black Mothers

Motherhood Village Peer-group support is now on ZOOM Tuesdays @ 8:00pm, and Sundays at 7:00pm. Email ashley@maternalwellness.orgto sign up and receive the secure link.

Are you longing for place? Community? Connection? Especially in this time of social isolation and unrest. We might have something you're in need of here at Maternal Wellness Center. Please contact us,if you are interested in any of these groups or classes. 

Warmly, 
Kellie Wicklund, LPC, PMH-C
Owner + Clinical Director, Maternal Wellness Center LLC